So
It's been a while because I've been out of town and because my posts were beginning to feel like a downer, felt like I was complaining a lot, and they were making me a bit down as well. I wanted to do something about this- being down when so much of my life is going so well. I got sick again, bleeding from my stomach this time, got referred to mental health again by my school, and finally went to see a psychiatrist. Happy day. I was so scared going in, and so badly didn't want to get medicated, but it has worked out so well- for the past three days. The doctor really listened to me, prescribed something called Wellbutrin, and while it couldn't possibly be truly in effect yet, just taking control of my life and my health has been an amazing experience, and very empowering. I have been so scared that I am aging myself- look so much older in the past three years- and I feel like maybe there is a light at the end of this tunnel. I actually had a calm thought yesterday, that reminded me of myself before I moved so far away from my family, and before my mom killed herself. I had worked so hard to get to a place of peace, and it was all shattered in these past years, and I feel like I am re-claiming it in a big way. Amazing. I will write/reflect more on this in the future...